


1994

by morkzone



Category: GOT7
Genre: Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-08-24
Updated: 2018-08-24
Packaged: 2019-07-01 22:47:02
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,743
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15783675
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/morkzone/pseuds/morkzone
Summary: Jinyoung goes home feeling drained from his work and Jaebum would try to cheer him up.





	1994

**Author's Note:**

> Hi. I know I’m supposed to finish writing my wip Markbum fic but I got into a slump lately. I am trying to move on and while doing so, I stumbled into this idea and kinda had a spark of inspiration to write it.
> 
> I know it isn’t much but I hope you guys still like this. Oh, and this isn’t a Markbum fic. It was supposed to, but somehow I couldn’t fit the character with Mark so I had to summon my inner Jinyoung for this one. LOL
> 
> And I suck at making titles. I couldn’t think of anything else right now, so let us settle with their birthyear. LMFAO
> 
> xoxo,  
> A

Jinyoung releases out a tired sigh while he lets his eyes wander around the familiar streets towards his apartment. His usually buttoned up shirt and tie had long been crumpled inside his leather messenger bag, leaving only his inner shirt and slacks on his body, looking utterly devastated, together with his equally tired heart. His usually pristine hairstyle had long been released into a mess on top of his head, leaving most of his hair curtaining along his eyes, covering the dark circles forming below his dark orbs. A contrast to his pristine aura every 7 o’ clock in the morning, where perfection could be equivalent to his whole being. He looked exhausted at most. He looked particularly pissed as well.

Being an HR Staff has managed to drain most of Jinyoung’s energy, leaving the rest of his strength to run on autopilot. In retrospect, his responsibilities were fun at first; he gets to interview people, talk about their lives and how they would be able to function for the job they’re vying for. Although Jinyoung is not so much of a people person by nature, the promise of exploring different personalities and diverse stories had made him become interested in accepting the position two years ago.

...or it may have been driven by the pressure from his batchmates’ achievements, who already got their lives figured out and making a damn name for themselves, while he, on the other hand, was still fumbling in finding out what it was he really wanted to do.

Jinyoung grabbed the very first opportunity that came up, psyching himself that he could do it, he could work through it.

And it doesn’t hurt that the company he’s in also pays well.

However, hearing stories over and over again about people’s experiences for the whole day can actually take a toll on someone’s sanity.

There were applicants that would blatantly lie about their employments—give lame attempts to hide about their tendencies to be negligent at their works, which sometimes put Jinyoung on the verge of yelling, _Bullshit!_ because that’s what they were giving him and that’s not what he’s being paid for.

There were those who are hard working and determined people, totally willing and capable of enduring the workload, but unfortunately, their qualifications wouldn’t fit the bill because of the humongous requirements the company he’s working for laid out. Such as years of work experiences, educational requirements, documents that sometimes it makes Jinyoung think if there would be a chance for them to prove themselves, because how can they start when clearly from the get go they have been rejected already? Jinyoung is tired of seeing their hopeful eyes get crushed with the realization that this wasn’t it—this application was not the answer to their wishes... they have to find it elsewhere, if there is elsewhere to begin with. He’s tired of explaining why they didn’t meet the requirements while continuously encouraging them to find a job until they find one they will be perfectly placed in. He’s tired of looking at his formerly colorful work experience that has now turned bleak as time passes by.

He counted the times he had to go home looking the same exact lifeless person he’s now, energy sucked dry and excitement long gone from his system. He had been asking himself for months if it was the right decision to take this job or it might have been better if he continued hoping to be something else.

Like that strong desire he once have of becoming an author.

But like this job he formerly enjoyed, that dream faded as years passed by, caused by continuous discouragement and insecurities that turned his hope to grey.

He drags his feet towards the couple flight of stairs to his doorstep, inserting his key in the knob and turning it slowly with a quiet snick. He lets out another deep breath, but this time with relief while he’s immediately enveloped by the coziness of the house where the living room is flooded with light. The sound system was already turned on, a sexy RnB track playing softly in the background while the delicious smell of food wafts across the adjacent dining area to where he stands.

Jinyoung could hear the showers being turned off, followed by the door of the bathroom opening, showing his handsome boyfriend’s face, looking fresh and delicious with beads of water still clinging onto his skin. Jinyoung would have smiled, would have bitten his lip in a lame attempt to seduce Jaebum if it wasn’t from the heaviness he could feel in his chest.

“Hey,” Jaebum immediately murmurs, eyeing him carefully and immediately sensing his mood. “Bad day?” he simply asks, like the usual observant Jaebum that he is.

Jinyoung had been friends with the slightly older guy for so long, growing up with him through high school and college, and falling in love with him probably longer than that. When they finally got through their painful mutual pining, the two of them immediately moved in together, both of their families accepting their decision without batting a single eye.

Jaebum, throughout the years, has become an extension of Jinyoung, knowing what he feels before he could even utter them. Jaebum could easily read him, knows what his expressions were for, if it was genuine or something he does for his prefect-man image.

Jinyoung didn’t have to say yes before Jaebum wraps him around in a tight embrace, the latter’s cold naked upper body enough to engulf his slightly smaller frame. It could have been silly, the way they looked right now, Jinyoung with his thin shirt and disheveled state while being consoled by his half naked boyfriend, lower half of his body covered by a skimpy boxer shorts.

Could they be anymore cliche?

“What can I do to make you feel better?” Jaebum whispers in his ear, enough to pull the last string of Jinyoung’s resolve, finally allowing himself to release the tears he’s been meaning to keep for longer. But he’s in his lover’s arms now, everything’s okay now—Jaebum is here with him... always, forever.

“Just hold me. I just need your hug,” he mutters between his heaving sobs, tearing his heart into pieces, admitting silently that he could no longer pretend that he was okay.

Jaebum lets him cry for a while, rubbing his boyfriend’s back to help ease him out of his despair, putting back the pieces of the younger boy’s heart that was already scattered in different places. Jaebum knows that Jinyoung has always been ambitious, a perfectionist with a little bit hardheadedness. He has always been a planner, a person keen to details that when his plans didn’t work out, it’s particularly harder for him to move passed that.

What’s worse is that he sometimes beat himself up from being unable to reach his goals at his self given timeframe, a slump that has been coming more often lately. The slightly older boy knows where it was coming from, and he knows that Jinyoung knows the answer to his burden, but the latter chooses to turn a blind eye.

“Do you want to quit work?” Jaebum asks softly after he felt Jinyoung calming down from his sobs. The slightly younger boy shakes his head in disapproval, forcing a smile through the lie.

”I don’t, besides, we have bills to pay and I can’t afford to be unemployed right now.”

Jaebum tuts at him condescendingly, like a parent scolding his petulant child.

“And I can’t afford seeing you suffer every damn day because you’re no longer enjoying what you do,” he says softly, rubbing the pads of his thumbs on Jinyoung’s soft skin, still wet from the latter’s tears.

“Then what should I do, hyung? It’s not like I could just drop everything and start anew. That’s crazy! I’m twenty-four years old. Who would take me?” he argues, voice shaking with uncertainty and fear. Jaebum’s eyes soften in concern for him, soothing his frayed nerves a little bit.

“Well, I would. You know I would always take you.”

“Hyuuuung,” Jinyoung whines, wiping his tears and involuntarily smiling from his boyfriend’s abrupt and random cheesiness.

“There you go, there’s his smile,” Jaebum mutters, smiling encouragingly at him and flicking his nose with his index finger. He pecks Jinyoung on the lips, before walking him towards the sofa, where he puts the younger on his lap, whilst rubbing soothing circles on his skin. “But honestly, Jinyoungie, you should do what you really want to do. Nothing and no one should stop you.“

The slightly younger boy averts his eyes from him, biting his lower lip in contemplation, hesitations not leaving his eyes.

“But what if I don’t know what to do? What if I never knew what I wanted to do, hyung?”

Jaebum chuckles at that.

“And what’s wrong with not knowing? If that’s how it should be, then stay unknowing to everything and try out each and every opportunities until you figure things out. Take as much time as you need instead of settling on one that most people would think was best. You will never know if you would just stay in one place. There’s no harm in trying.”

Jinyoung closes his eyes in contemplation, forehead leaning against Jaebum’s chin, his hot breath ghosting his boyfriend’s exposed skin. They stayed that way for a while, the soft tune of an indie RnB song still playing in the background while the softness of their beat up sofa envelopes their bodies. Jinyoung could hear his boyfriend’s breathing, and he couldn’t help but sync his with it.

A moment has passed, and Jaebum finally spoke, voice piercing the silence with his heavy question. “How about this, if you have the time, the money and all the resources you would need for it, what or where would you rather be right now?”

Jinyoung’s breathing hitched at the question, body being pushed down by the weight of his boyfriend’s question.

Didn’t he asked that himself many times in his head already? When the quietness of the night takes over and he would contemplate alone in the living room. When sleep has become so elusive and he would often space out, escape with the fictional stories in his mind, characters swirling like ribbons, dancing and teasing him with a heartwarming journey he’s still too afraid to continue. When the reality of what he chose became dreadful to face everyday. When he would drown in Jaebum’s black eyes, and he wished they could star in so many stories he will let bleed on paper and send out for people to see.

Jinyoung has answered that question too many times already that he lost count. However, he still couldn’t understand what it really is holding him back.

“You know what you wanted to do, Jinyoungie,” Jaebum says matter of factly, eyes seeing through him, as if he could read what’s on his mind. “But what is wrong? Why can’t you grab it? Is it because of money? Babe, we both have savings and I recently got promoted, I can hold the fort for a while for the both of us.”

“It’s not that...” Jinyoung trails off, nuzzling his chin on Jaebum’s collarbone.

“Then what? Time? You still have time. You’re not too old to start writing. Or wait, is this because of your skills in writing?” Jinyoung’s breathing hitches, giving away his insecurities he’s tried to hide for quite a long time. Jaebum cups his cheek so he could tenderly stare at his face. “Jinyoung, you could write well, I read your short stories before in college, didn’t I? And I loved them. If you need improvement, you could always enrol in a writing or literature crash course. Right?”

“But what if even if I studied again, I suck? What if no one likes it?”

“Well, how would we both know the answer to something you still haven’t done yet? It’s hard to know and to tell when we don’t have any reference for comparison, don’t you think so?”

“But I’m... I’m scared. I’m scared of really losing this dream, hyung. This is the only one I have. I really wanted to do this,” he whispers, eyes glancing back at the slightly older boy, transparent and full of apprehension. Jaebum kisses his forehead in admiration, a quiet gratitude for the younger’s rare display of vulnerability.

“Jinyoungie, if you like it so much then go ahead and do it. You shouldn’t let your passion die just because you’re scared of falling every now and then. Besides, I’m here. I will hold you like this every time you’d feel scared. Wouldn’t that count?”

Jinyoung stares at his boyfriend’s earnest eyes, complete with admiration and fondness he’s used to seeing since they were kids. He tried to look back at their childhood, their high school life together; when they both worked on their relationship through college and until now that they’re both adults, trying to wade through the murky waters of adulthood and responsibilities. Jaebum had always been beside him, cheering him on and encouraging him to grow. And every time he’d get into this point, it was his boyfriend who’s holding him tightly like this.

 _Maybe this might work_ , he thinks.

“You…You think I should really do this, hyung? You believe in me?”

Jaebum grins boyishly at him, eyes amused from something only he seems to know.

“For someone who has an AB Political Science as a degree but writes music for a living, I’d say you go for it and see where it takes you... that’s what you told me, right? When it was me who’s struggling with my choices? And yes, I believe in you. Always.”

Jinyoung smiles then, renewed hope igniting in his chest. Whatever inhibitions he has, finally melted away with just one assurance he’s looking for from one person that matters. Jaebum’s enough to keep his doubts away. Jaebum’s enough to give him the push he’s looking for.

“What did I do to be so lucky and have such a wonderful boyfriend?” he asks Jaebum, tone wistful and a tad bit teasing.

Jaebum chuckles lightly at that, hands now resting behind his head arrogantly, saying, “What can I say? I’m a rare gem. You should be thankful that you have me.”

Jinyoung shakes his head in exasperation, voice sarcastic but without heat, “Now, only if he’s humble and then he must have been perfect,” he chides, laughing when his boyfriend started to tickle him into submission. They were now rolling on the sofa the next moment, body tangled together like a pretzel, no one knows where one begins and one ends.

They were both breathless and are catching their breaths when Jaebum stopped poking Jinyoung’s sides. Pecking the younger’s cheek, he then spoke, “Now let me be the perfect boyfriend by telling you that we should eat before our food goes soggy. I cooked breaded pork cutlet and miso soup.”

Jinyoung hugs him tightly then, nuzzling his face deeper into the crook between Jaebum’s shoulder and neck. He lets out a deep sigh, a long and deep relieved sigh that eased his mind for a bit. He may not feel ultimately better than before, but somehow he thinks that there was a change. He may not be able to quit his job the very next day because—he has to be real, he couldn’t really be rash about his decisions but at least he could start planning for this one.

He may not be able to change the path of his life in a blink of an eye, but at least this time there’s a glimpse of hope even from afar.

He’ll start reaching for his dream, one step at a time.

“Then what are we waiting for? Let’s eat my greatest boyfriend’s breaded pork cutlet and miso soup!” he yells, rising from the sofa and running towards the dining table to eat. Jaebum follows him immediately, body now clad in a thin shirt he grabbed from the bathroom. Jinyoung smiles brightly at him then, passing a bowl of rice for him to eat. Jaebum places a meat on top of Jinyoung’s spoon of rice then, encouraging him to eat more.

At that moment, on both sides of their secondhand oakwood table that must have seen better days, Jinyoung realizes that everything seems to be possible and attainable…

So long as he has Jaebum on his side.

 


End file.
